Evaluating Your Support.
A new year brings a time of reflection, hope, and excitement. It’s a time where we naturally allow ourselves to say good bye to our past and welcome our future. It’s a time where we allow ourselves to dream, to set goals, and identify change. It’s a time where we talk about finding not only ourselves, but our best selves. It’s usually a time where we take a close look at ourselves, and think about personal growth. Today, I am going to challenge you to not only look at yourself, but the people around you.
I have a confession to make. This may be too personal for some of you to read, but I promise there is a profound message behind all of this. I have not purchased new bras since I was in college. Who enjoy’s bra shopping, anyway? They are expensive, and I can find a million other more exciting things to spend money on, then new bras. But, here’s the thing, it’s been like ten plus years, and well, if I may be honest, they are falling apart. I’m way overdue for some new bras. So, I drug myself into Victoria’s Secret today, because, who doesn’t love a sale. And if I’m going to buy new bra’s, they better be on sale. And yes, while there, I decided to get fitted... and guess what, I’ve been wearing the wrong size bra, for, well, I don’t even know how many years.
Talk about moving forward in the new year with proper support! Ok, all jokes aside, but that’s the real message here. I’ve been wearing the wrong size, which probably didn’t leave me with great support. It’s easy to get complacent, to get stuck, to get comfortable... but, having the proper support is extremely important... and now I’m not just talking about breast health!
Businessman and motivational speaker Jim Rohn said,
“You’re the average of the five people you spend most of your time with.”
Think about that for a minute... because I’m now talking about that kind of support. You hear it all the time- your ride or die crew, your family, your squad... but do you really take note to what that means. You ARE the average of the five people you spend the most time with. How does that make you feel? Are you excited by the possibilities that unleashes? Are you horrified? When is the last time you evaluated who you spend your time with, who you identify as your support system?
The good news is, it’s a new day, and a new year. It’s never too late to re-evaluate, to re-measure. If I didn’t take the time today to get sized properly, I’d still be walking around unsupported. It’s the same for the people in your life. Society has made us feel like we want to be the best at everything, be the smartest person in the room. But here is my real challenge to you--- How about spending time with five people smarter than you, more talented than you, more successful than you. Imagine the opportunities that will open for you. Imagine all you can learn, and absorb, from spending time with brilliant, successful, talented people. Imagine the drive that will ignite in you, the motivation you will receive, the push it will give you.
I have been working with a mentor, and that has been a positive experience for me, for a lot of different reasons. But, easily, one the biggest reasons for that success, is because she is someone I respect and admire. I strive to be a better person because of her. She guides me to be that better person. She challenges me. She doesn’t except the mundane, and has taught me that I shouldn’t either. We challenge each other. We learn and grow from one another, because success is contagious.
She shared a recent sermon from a visiting pastor at her Church, Pastor Jeremiah Stingl. He did a sermon yesterday on moving forward. He talked about things that really resonated with me, including an analogy of not spending too much time looking in the rearview mirror. He also spoke about assessing the people you are spending your time with. He said “Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future.” He went on to say
“The key to your calling is your crowd.”
He explained that as long as you are still breathing, God has a purpose for you. You may have yet to discover that purpose, but Paster Jeremiah explained that God has a person for you that will help you discover that purpose, but asked, “do you have room for them, or are you full”.
I’m not suggesting you dispose of those in your life. I am suggesting that you work to identify your supports from those that may bring toxicity into your relationships. Perhaps you just need to make some changes with how much time you spend with someone who can be toxic. If you are not satisfied with your top 5, make sure you have room for the right person to come along. Trust me when I say that “your person” may already be someone in your life. My person was in my life far before they were IN my life. It’s all about timing, and being open and willing.
Happy New Year! Wishing you love, happiness, and amazing support in 2019!
Love Always, Alycia and Bluebelle